Camping

So, we went camping over the weekend. It was pretty fun, except that I've decided that I don't like the rules National Parks tend to have. You can't hike with your dog, you're not allowed to collect firewood or antlers, you have to pay to get into the park and then pay to camp there. At one point I even saw a sign that said "Meadow Closed." How exactly does one close a meadow? Stupidist sign I'd ever seen.

But the good thing about camping in a National Park is that there is a lot of wildlife out there to see. On our first night there (Friday), a deer walked right through our campsite then lounged under a tree for maybe an hour before simply getting up and walking away. The second night there (Saturday), an entire freaking herd of elk wandered through the campground, then walked up to within 20 feet of our campsite to munch on something some bozos next door to us had left in their firepit (it was a Tazo Chai Tea package. And they were both me. You do the math.) One of the elk had two little babies with her, and they were adorable. Then, when we were heading out on Sunday morning, a moose crossed the street in front of us. Yes, a moose. I didn't even know we had those in Colorado.

Also, we have possibly the smartest dumb dog ever. He saw the deer, and nearly scared the poor thing off, and he even saw the moose from the car. But the elk? He never saw them, and when he did, he only sniffed at them for a few seconds before going back to begging for food. Silly mutt.

Mickey got pictures of the elk and the deer, which I'll probably post here when I get them from her later.

In the meantime, I wanted to post this picture I finally got from our trip to Vegas. Yes, I know it was two months ago, but I wanted to show it off earlier and couldn't find it:

You can probably barely see it, but if you look close enough, there is a Blue Man in that picture, between me and my sisters. They're creepy, cool, and very sweet all at once, and I even got a CD signed by one of them. Mickey got a set of drumsticks used in the show, and one of them signed that as well. I'll probably be going to see the show when it comes to the Pikes Peak Center later this year, that's how much I enjoyed it. I recommend the Blue Man Group to anyone, really. There wasn't a bad moment in the show!

Stuck

I'm stuck. I just don't know what to do anymore. I want to leave this God forsaken city and go someplace exciting like L.A. or NYC, but I need a job that pays more than five dollars an hour first. Unfortunately for me, I'm apparently unhireable.

I can't get a damn job.

And I'm sick of it.

I guess that I had been hoping that applying to schools outside of the state would maybe give me an opportunity get the hell out of here, but I haven't heard back from the school I really wanted to go to. I sent them a fifty dollar, non-refundable application fee, and they fucking never got back to me. I just diaappeared into their goddamn system like so many others. And you'd think calling the admissions office would yield some results, huh? Nope. The lady gave me her phone number, but apparently doesn't know how to answer the damn thing. I'm trying for a school in New Mexico now, but I'm not holding my breath.

God, my mother's right. I'm going to be living with my parents forever. How sad is that?

*heavy sigh*

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Pt. 2!

I saw it last night (opening day), and I absolutely loved it! I'm a huge fan of the books and I own all but the first two (which I should really go buy at some point). I liked the first two movies, but after the third one the quality of the movies went down a bit. I understand it's hard to get everything exactly the same as it is in the book, but by the time it hit the fourth movie, the movies had strayed quite a bit from the books.

So, when I heard that they weren't going to cut anything out of the seventh movie, I was so excited I could've literally peed myself. They split it up into two movies, so that they could keep everything from the book. I saw the first part in theaters, then saw the second part just last night.

I wasn't originally going to go see it this close to opening day, but my cousin wanted to see it and is going to Hawaii tonight, so he invited Mickey and I to go see it with him and a friend of his. I have to say, that movie had some of the best graphics, and everything looked realistic even in 3D. I loved the story from the book, and the movie followed fairly faithfully besides a few edits here and there (for example, the final battle in the book takes place in the Great Hall for the most part, but in the movie it's spread out to the entire castle and even onto the grounds), and some dialogue was added, but it only made it a bit more epic in my opinion. One of the only issues I had with the movie was that, if someone had only seen the movies and not read the books, they would probably have a hard time figuring out who all of these characters were. I know at one point I even looked at Tonks and said to myself, "Wait, who is this?" because she wasn't in the movies all that much after her introduction in the fifth one.

*shrug* Oh, well.

At least it kept faithful to the books.

I do have to say, however, that the ending was "semi-anti-climactic," as my cousin put it. This was the way it was in the book, too, so I'm not really complaining, but there's just something about the way the whole series ends that just leaves me wanting more from the final battle. I felt this way reading the book, too, so it's not the movie's fault in that respect.

All in all, I really enjoyed the movie. I highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys Harry Potter, and even some people who didn't like the first movies! Trust me, it's pretty epic.

Holding the Hose

Okay, so.

Recently my parents split the cost of a tent trailer with my aunt and uncle. The thing is totally old and needs a lot of work, including pinstriping along the sides. So we bought some pinstriping and it's taken us three days, but we managed to get it done...I hope.

But today. Today I lost all semblance of sanity and made a complete ass out of myself. Today, when we were pinstriping, Tinkerbelle told me to grab hold of a hose for...some kind attachment to the trailer so that she could get under it to get the striping to look nice. I grabbed the small hose, held it up, looked over to my mother, and said with a totally serious face and a nod:

"Holding the hose!"

It sounded so ridiculous that all three of us started laughing hysterically to the point that we couldn't even stand up anymore. I had to wipe off my glasses three times because I was crying.

And I feel like a total ass for it.

It was ridiculous, and I have no idea what the hell possessed me to say such a thing in such a way. It just came out of my mouth without me even really thinking about it. Such a dirty remark...Oi.

Anyways.

This weekend, we're going camping. We just got back from Vegas, I just got done with jury duty, and now we're going camping. Criminey, can't we just find SOME kinda time to...rest? Oh well. At least the trailer will be pinstriped and my mom and sister will have a funny story to tell about me to my relatives.

*facepalm*

Kid's Shows

Yes, I occasionally do watch shows meant for little kids. The fact that I babysit has something to do with it, but I'll admit that even before taking on the responsibility of watching a 7 year old girl I occasionally watched shows like Dora the Explorer or Handy Manny.

Because I am a dork.

I find it hard to watch the shows on Disney Channel though, because I grew up with classics such as The Lion King and Aladdin and the shows those movies spawned. I watched shows like Mickey Mouse Club and Chip N' Dale Rescue Rangers. I watched movies like The Little Mermaid or Beauty and the Beast, and I enjoyed them.

Kid's shows didn't seem to insult the intelligence of the kids watching them. They treated kids like smart individuals who could understand more than people gave them credit for. Some people might say I'm remembering the shows this way because I was a kid myself when I watched them. But I recently found myself looking up some of the old shows I used to watch on the internet (lovely place, isn't it?), and watching a few of them. And while some of the dumber jokes came across as cheesey to me now, the shows themselves were good. I could enjoy them just as much as an adult as I did as a child. Maybe it's nostalgia talking; but maybe, just maybe, shows were smarter back then.

Take Peter Pan for instance. Looking back on that movie now, there were actually quite a few adult themes hidden within it (not the least of which is the blatant racism against Native Americans). As a child, I enjoyed the movie, but as an adult, I find I can appreciate it just a bit more, and formulate my own opinion about what's going on rather than rely on my parents to explain some of it to me. The same goes for many of the movies I watched as a little kid.

And I'm all for making a television show based on a movie. I used to watch Timon and Pumbaa all the time when I was little. And hell, I LOVE Penguins of Madagascar. As long as the television show keeps true to the original characters from the movie, it's not a big deal.

Which leads me to the point of this post.

Remember when I mentioned Peter Pan earlier? Captain Hook was right up there in the list of Disney Villians that scared the living shit out of me as a kid. The fact that he was willing to kill a little girl (Wendy) by making her walk off the edge of a plank and drown in the water terrified me to no end, especially considering that I was a little girl myself when I first watched the movie. And I knew perfectly well that, if Wendy died, Hook would have killed the rest of those kids as well. It was terrifying to me. Sure Hook was a little whiny and annoying, but when it came right down to it, he was scary as hell.

Well, the other night I fell asleep with my tv on. I had been watching a movie on Disney Channel, so that's what was on when I woke up. Now, Disney Channel, like many other television networks for kids, has a broadcast time in the morning reserved specifically for preschoolers. These are the types of shows adults watch that make us literally feel like our brains are melting. They call it Disney Junior. And most of the shows are like any other kid's tv show, and they like to teach children lessons about life and how to act around other people.

Well, Disney Junior recently became host to a show called Jake and the Neverland Pirates. I guess it's primary purpose is to teach children how to share, or something. I don't know, I've never actually watched a full episode. The premise is that Jake, his two friends, and their obnoxious talking parrot somehow managed to get into Neverland and become child pirates. They search for treasure and stuff. *shrug*

Okay, remember what I said about Captain Hook? How he used to terrify me as a child and all that jazz?

Well, if you ever watch Jake and the Neverland Pirates, you will be throwing everything I said about the pirate out the window.

Hook, as I said before, was always kind of whiny and ridiculous, but he always managed to get the job done. If it hadn't been for Peter Pan, he would have probably killed off most of the people in Neverland by now. And true, it's a little silly that one boy with the power to fly could take down an entire crew of pirates just with wit and a little bit of gumption, but that was part of what made the story charming.

In Jake and the Neverland Pirates, they've completely taken out any competency Hook may have possessed, and turned him into a whiny, completely useless man-child. He LITERALLY throws temper tantrums when things don't go his way, and instead of trying to steal back the treasure the kids stole from him (way to teach kids a lesson, Disney! Let's teach them to steal!), he just sits on his boat and sulks like a little boy.

Now, as I've said before, I don't mind when people make a television show off of a movie, so long as the characters match the personalities of the originals. With this particular show, they've made Captain Hook a laughing stock within the Disney universe. It's absolutely ridiculous, to be completely honest.

I'd hate to see what the writers of this show would do to other Disney Villians.

I guess my main problem with this is that kids now will never be able to truly appreciate the "classic" days of Disney. The little girl I babysit has never seen Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, or Beauty and the Beast (though she does know all of the princesses by name). I had to force her to sit down and watch Aladdin, which she wound up truly enjoying anyway.

I know that I'm a little biased toward the way I first saw things. I hate remixes of songs simply for the fact that it's a change from the original song, and I hate change. I don't like it when Glee performs songs like Defying Gravity, because it takes away from the original, and those who have seen Glee's version first like that version better and say that Idina Menzel "sings it wrong." Maybe this whole rant is simply because, yes I do hate change, and I hate the way they've changed one of my favorite Disney Villians.

I don't know, maybe I'm just feeling nostalgic? Either way, it annoys me.

A Big Decision

I've decided to go back to school.

I'm hoping to go to school and gain my BFA in musical theater. It unfortunately requires me to go to school out of state, because Colorado sucks when it comes to theater, but I think I can do it. I'm pretty exciting, and I've already applied to three schools and have an audition set up with one. If all works out, I should be heading out to classes at the beginning of next year (January or February, depending on which school takes me).

I'm pretty excited, but also nervous. I'm trying to get into an INCREDIBLY competative field, where only the best of the best excell at what they do. I know I'm good, and I'm somewhat confident, but I also have this fear that I won't be good ENOUGH. It sucks really.

Oh, well. At least I'm trying, right?

Another Game Night

My family likes game nights. Well...not my immediate family, my extended family. My immediate family is fine with sitting down to play a game of cards or Monopoly, and we don't need to make a huge deal out of it.

Game Night wouldn't be such a big deal (to me, anyway) if we didn't play games like Cranium or Trivial Pursuit at 10:00 at night, when we're all fighting to stay awake. It's like everyone on that side of the family doesn't ever sleep. They're awake in the middle of the day, and then they're awake at freaking midnight, and THEY NEVER SEEM TIRED! It's ridiculous.

Unfortunately, they also seem to believe that everyone else is the same.

Every time we have Game Night, we don't start playing until 8 or 9 at night. Now, Tinkerbelle gets bitchy when she gets tired, and games are not an acception to that rule (although, lately she's been bitchier than normal, so being tired seems to have nothing to do with it anymore). The main problem is that we seem to have to work around everyone's work schedules -- everyone's work schedules except ours, of course.

Last year, Thanksgiving was postponed because my cousin had to work.

Everyone wanted Tinkerbelle to try and get off early from work the last Game Night we had so that we could work around their schedule.

My cousin had us hold off on Christmas presents because he had to work (really, what kind of shitty job has you working on Christmas?).

Tinkerbelle had to get up early the next morning for work, and they were here until almost midnight.

See what I mean?

It's like the entire family revolves around my know-it-all cousin. Now, keep in mind that my cousin is nearly 40, has never had a girlfriend, works at Comcast answering phones for a living (seriously, what a shitty job), has some kind of computer degree he does nothing with, is working toward getting another degree he'll probably do nothing with, and may as well still live with his parents since he's always around them anyway. He lives in his grandfather's house (his mother's father), and visits his parents every single day. He vacations with them, every time they go on vacation. He goes curtain shopping with his mother. He goes grocery shopping with his mother. He shares every single opinion he has with his mother. Seriously, there's something wrong with that relationship. I mean, I completely and totally understand loving your mother with all your heart, but if you can't even stay home when she goes on vacation halfway across the world, you have a serious problem. It would be different (maybe) if her husband were dead, but he's not.

And I'm sick of the family revolving around this Mamma's Boy.

Luckily, tonight we played a game we could all enjoy. It wasn't too difficult, but still kept us on our toes, and it was entertaining while being something everyone could do (instead of acting, sculpting, or drawing).

Now, my entire family? We're visual learners. We need to physically see how something is done in order to understand it. Which basically means that, when we're playing a new game, we all need to see, read, and understand the rules in order to have a good time.

Unfortunately, my cousin is like, the Rule Nazi, and doesn't share the rules.

Tinkerbelle actually had to stand up and steal the rules from behind his back just to understand what the hell she was doing in the game. He never noticed, but I'm sure he would have uttered an annoyed sigh and audible eye-roll had he seen. He's like a man with the remote to the t.v. except...with a piece of paper that comes inside the game box.

To top it off, my aunt seemed really pissed off tonight, for no reason I could really understand.

Oh, and my aunt's brother and sister-in-law (my aunt married into the family and isn't related to us by blood) have a SEVERELY autistic little girl, who likes to scream for no reason and tear glasses off of your face. Granted, I know she can't really help that sort of thing, but...damn. I really, REALLY hope I don't have an autistic child, because I would not be able to handle it. And this is coming from someone who's mother once told her that she thought she was autistic as a baby (and I still may have Asperger's, though I've never been diagnosed). Luckily for us, the nurse they have working for them offered to stay until the game was over. That kept the little girl occupied the whole night, which was nice. Yes, they have a nurse working in their house taking care of thier child. That's how severe she is.

Anyways, it's been an eventful evening, my cousin's birthday. Oh, yes, it was that same annoying cousin's birthday today. I've lost track of how old he is but...I think he was born when my mom was 8 or so...I don't feel like doing math, bleh.

He's good for something, though! He's taking me to Les Miserables in September.

Legally Blonde the Musical

I mentioned in an earlier post that I was going to see Legally Blonde the Musical. Well, I did. We just got back a few hours ago. It really was a blast, and I'd actually love to go see it again. I have to admit that I was a little apprehensive at first. I mean, Legally Blonde isn't the kind of thing you would expect to see on the Broadway stage. I loved the movie, though, so I was willing to give it a chance.

Plus, it's a Broadway show, so...duh! Of course I'm going to go see it!

The show started out with a song called Ohmigodyouguys. Which has to be one of the most annoying songs ever in any Broadway show I've ever seen or heard. Luckily for me, the rest of the songs were actually pretty good, and the story very closely followed the movie (with a few script changes here and there to accomodate the stage). Unfortunately for me, it seemed to be the show's freaking theme song, and they liked to stick it in there whenever they got the chance. The song Ireland was fairly amusing, and since it had an Irish sound to it, I liked it. And of course, there was a song titled Legally Blonde, which surprisingly didn't even show up until act two.

The highlight was Bend and Snap though. Yes, they made an entire song and dance out of the one scene in the movie. And yes, it does in fact end with Paulette breaking the UPS guy's nose (he's named Kyle in the show, but I can't remember if he had that name in the movie). She ends the song with a lovely little "Oh, crap!" It's funny.

It seemed like a lot of the cast had a cold though. Emmette in particular (played by a very cute actor named Nic Rouleau) missed a lot of his notes. And it's not like it wasn't noticable; he was very clearly falling just flat of hitting his notes. Most of the cast seemed to be like this, but it was Emmette who was the most noticable.

And may I just mention one thing?

The men in this production? HOT!

H-O-T, hot. Smoking, really. It was fun to watch, just for that alone.

There's a scene in the very beginning of the play, when Elle is trying to study for the LSATs to get into Harvard, where all these frat boys appear on stage to announce that there's this big party. They're all very cute...and very, very shirtless.

Again, HOT.

All in all, I had a nice night! I just wish Tinkerbelle had enjoyed it more. Apparently she had a headache. She just didn't seem that into it. Which is a shame, since she was the one who invited me. *shrug* Oh, well. She did laugh a few times, so I suppose it wasn't a total loss.

Colds Suck

The title pretty much says it all.

I caught a cold from Mickey and Tinkerbelle, who both had it for about two weeks. Yay. I can't breathe through my nose, I'm sleeping like crap, I'm dizzy and cold, and I'm achy. On top of all of this, I need to work this week, babysitting. Fortunately for me, my little charge seems to understand someone being sick. Unfortunately for me, she also can't seem to entertain herself for long and therefore keeps asking me to do stuff with her.

I hope this cold at least suppresses itself by Thursday. Tinkerbelle and I are going to go see Legally Blonde on Thursday, and if I'm all gross and sniffly, I won't be able to enjoy it. Well...not as much as I normally would, anyway. Let's face it, it doesn't matter how bad I'm feeling, seeing a live Broadway show will always entertain me in some way.

By the way, colds suck.

Legally Blonde!

Not the movie, although it was a great movie. The musical. It's coming to Colorado Springs next week.

Yes, there's a Legally Blonde musical.

Tinkerbelle found out about it and asked me if I wanted to go see it with her, which surprised the hell out of me, I have to say. We bought our tickets last Friday, and the tickets arrived today. We're going to see it next Thursday, and I'm really excited. There's nothing better than a live Broadway show. Nothing in the world. I love it.

So far I've seen The Lion King, Wicked, Les Miserables, and Spamalot live. And I loved them all. Time to add Legally Blonde to that list. I'm so excited!!

Game Night

Wow. I haven't updated this blog in a while. But what better way to get back into action with *drumroll*

More complaining!

We all went out on Saturday night to some area halfway between Denver and Castle Rock, where my aunt's brother and sister-in-law live, for game night. This wouldn't be so bad, except for a few things.

1. They have an extremely severly autistic daughter.
Now, I'm not one who makes fun of any kind of disability (unless it's ADD, which I think people play up bigtime), but I just don't know how to handle this kid. I have a short temper, and she goes around grabbing people's faces and ripping glasses off of your face. She also enjoys popping out of nowhere and yelling nonsense while she uses you as some sort of springboard. I don't know how I would react if she were to do something like that to me. I mean, I don't want to hit her; that would be bad. But it would most likely be my first response to something so...startling. I'm screwed if I ever have an autistic kid.

2. My cousin.
The guy apparently dictates anything the family does. If he has to work, we need to push Thanksgiving dinner back or move an entire vacation around. If he wants to see a movie, he's going to see one, curfew be damned. He's a know-it-all, who doesn't actually know it all and it makes me want to scream. He actually told Tinkerbelle on Saturday night that the reason she gets nervous on the drive between Colorado Springs and Castle Rock, along Monument Pass, isn't the slippery roads or the traffic. It's the fact that visibility is a pain. So...lemme get this straight: If that's what makes him nervous, it's what makes everyone nervous? I thought Tinkerbelle was going to go off on him and punch him in the face when he did that. Because it is the slippery roads and crappy drivers that make her nervous, not the lack of visibility. We live in a neighborhood that gets foggy while the rest of the city is sunny. We know how to drive in fog.
On top of that, he ALWAYS chooses the game for game night. And it's always some crappy game that involves art or charades, which I've discovered my family is no good at. Granted, those are the only well-known games that can be played by big groups, but they're not the only games.
To top it all off, he practically called all of the women in our family, including his own mother, stupid yesterday. What an idiot.

3. The little boy.
The autistic kid's little brother is a brat. If they read this blog, they'll probably thwap me upside the head for writing it, but it's true! The kid is a spoiled, over-protected brat who likes to steal the spotlight.

4. The time.
It's like no one in that family has a concept of how late it actually gets when the sun goes down. They all stay up late, and they all think everyone else does too. On Christmas day, we went there for game night, and I had to get up early the next morning to work. We stayed there until nearly 11 o'clock. This last time, Tink had to get up early. It was only through extreme coaxing on her part that we got out of there before 10. They originally wanted to make the night happen about 9. 9!! Luckily we moved it up to 5.

So, there you have it: four reasons why I hate game night. And I get to go to Vegas with these people. Lucky, lucky me.

Taking Some Responsibility Would Be Nice!

I am so sick and tired of doing things right and getting stepped on because of it. I'm not an aggressive person, and I don't know how to be. It's not in my nature. So people take that as an advantage and use it to walk all over me like a cheap carpet.

I was at the DMV today to renew my registration for my car. It took all of twenty minutes and I was done. I had the little sticker and was on my way out the door. I got to my car, got inside and took my keys out of my purse. My keys were in my hand -- repeat, NOT IN THE IGNITION -- when I suddenly heard a loud scraping noise and my entire car began rocking back and forth. I turned around in my seat to see a young driver in a white Chevy Impala, firmly attached to the back bumper of my car. He obviously cursed and pulled all the way through (rather than stopping right there), which scratched my car further. I got out of my car and we exchanged insurance information. I probably shouldn't have given him mine, granted, and maybe the police should have been called. But in my never-wavering faith of people, I gave him my insurance info in exchange for his and drove away.

Now, like an idiot, I forgot to write down the name of his insurance provider.

I looked up his family online (with the information acquired from his insurance card) and called his house to get the name of his provider. He answered the phone and I heard his mother coaching him in the background. He didn't hit me, I backed into him, and his mother was there to witness it from the DMV window. I asked again for his provider's name and he simply said he had to speak with his parents before hanging up.

I'm sorry, he was alone in that car! And we were three or four isles away from the DMV window, so NO ONE could have seen the accident from there. I didn't even have the car on, and suddenly I'm being called a bad driver. Turns out I got hit my a Momma's Boy, and she is incredibly intent upon keeping her little baby's driving record perfectly clean.

I'm thinking that they're not going to claim it, and hope that the whole thing will just go away. Problem is that they underestimate the power of the internet. I have their home address and phone number, and I did fill out a police report online. We called Progressive (which I recalled as being his provider, but I'm probably wrong), and they took our claim information. And we called our own insurance company to find out what happens should they file a claim.

Now let me make one thing abundantly clear: I always -- ALWAYS -- look behind me when backing out, simply to avoid THIS EXACT SITUATION. I have a job, but not one that can pay for a hike in insurance prices to cover my car, so I drive carefully. I always go speed limit, and I always pay some kind of fucking attention when I'm driving down the road. Just because this 17-year-old pansy ass momma's boy won't pay attention to where the hood of his fucking car is, now I'm suddenly the one at fault.

Granted, I made some big mistakes in this situation.

But I did not -- repeat, NOT -- back up into him. Anyone who has ever ridden with me or watched me drive knows this. I am NOT a reckless driver. And screw that boy and his overprotective mother for saying so.

I think that he should take some responsibility for the accident that he caused, and his mother should make him do so, instead of protecting him from the law. A few days ago, a white Chevy Impala with a young driver nearly sideswiped Tinkerbelle as she drove to a job interview, then screamed at her saying that it was a brand new car (like it's some sort of excuse for not paying some kind of attention to the road around him). The description I made to Momma and Tinkerbelle of the boy driving matching that of the description Tinkerbelle has of the kid that almost hit her. If it is indeed the same driver (all the evidence matches up except for the fact that I'm not sure if the car had temp tags or not), then this little boy's momma needs to teach him how to drive rather than protect him from accidents. Otherwise he won't know what he's doing wrong and will wind up being seriously injured or killed in a car accident. And he needs to grow some kind of backbone and take responsibility for hitting a parked car in the parking lot. I'm beginning to wonder if he would have left any kind of information had he hit my car while I was still in the DMV, or if he would have just run and let it be.

Oh, and just for the record, had I been any slower getting into my car, my door would have been opened and probably damaged as well. I may have even been hurt, I'm not sure. If he's dumb enough to not pay attention to the hood of his car, then he may be dumb enough to try and pull into a space next to a car with their door wide open.

*le sigh* What an afternoon...

*heavy sigh*

Ever have one of those days where you just feel totally useless? Like you're not doing anything positive or significant with your life? This was one of those days for me.

I woke up feeling fine. Perfect, actually, and in one of the best moods I've been in in a long time. I'm up for a job of sorts, taking care of my mom's boss's daughter, so that's always good. At least it will be some money for a while, even if it's not much. I could start paying my cell phone bill and car insurance and take some of the pressure off my parents. Now if the lady would just call me back...

Anyways, I went on facebook earlier today. Most of my friends are old friends from high school who I try (and fail) to keep in contact with. Looking over all of their profiles today, I realized just how much all of them are moving on and doing things with their lives that make a difference and make them feel important. And here I am, just...stuck.

Even if I do get this job, it won't be enough money for me to move out on my own. At least not anytime soon. And I live in the suckiest town in America for acting, so I still won't be able to act even after getting money. I have this fear that I'll just be stuck for the rest of my life in a job and city I hate while all my friends move on and pursue their dreams, and I don't want that. I'm 22 years old and still living with my parents, and even after getting a job, I still can't move out. It sucks. Majorly.

And I don't know how to make it...not suck.

*le sigh*

Okay, so.

Not the best of days.

I got $20 from my grandparents for my birthday, and I have yet to spend it. Mostly because I don't know what I want to spend it on. So I thought it would be fun for all of us to go shopping today. Momma wanted some decorative things for her garden and Poppa was in the mood to spend some money. So was I. I originally wanted to go to the mall and walk around there. We wound up going to a sports warehouse to look at tents because we lost our RV (damn economy).

Then we get a call from Tinkerbelle, who was at work. She was coming home and offered to meet us at wherever we were. Poppa said it would just be easier for us to go home and pick her up so we wouldn't be wasting gas in two cars. So we picked her up and headed out...to an RV store.

Where they didn't even have RVs for us to look at!

Then we headed to an Ace Hardware store for Momma to find garden stuff. Tinkerbell mentioned wanting to go to American Furniture Warehouse to find a headboard. Meanwhile, my plans to go to the mall and have a nice day shopping around were dashed. We never got to AFW, because Tinkerbell threw a fit about going out in her Target garb. So we came back home for her to change. She promptly threw herself down on the couch and took a short nap.

Then my uncle calls because he found a car or RV or something and wants Poppa to come look at it.

Tinkerbell promptly threw a fit (as per usual), which pissed Poppa off and there was a huge blowup. I still never got to the mall, and still have $20 burning a hole in my pocket.

Remember that I was the one who suggested going out shopping.

We never did a damn thing I wanted to do.

Comcast is Effed Up

Okay, so we have Comcast as a cable provider. So far, I've been nothing but upset with them in the way they provide service. Both for the tv and for the internet. My internet will just randomly shut down for no reason, when I'm literally ten feet away from the browser thingy. And lately the signal for our cable has decided to cut in and out for no reason. It's annoying when you're watching tv and suddenly have no picture, or a picture that's all blocky and weird.

And now we find out that we're going to need a box for EVERY SINGLE TV IN THE HOUSE if we wanna keep our cable connection.

WHAT????

The reason we even got cable is because the dish required each television to have a box hooked up to it that we had to pay for. We couldn't afford it. And without cable or satellite dish, we literally get no tv service because of the fact that all tv's went to digital signals. Now Comcast has decided to screw every one of their customers over and REQUIRE them to have a box for every single tv, each costing at least an extra $10 a month. Which we can't afford.

I have a good idea! Let's make people pay more for their bills, but pay them less when they work! Isn't that an awesome idea?? Isn't it?

God Almighty, I really hate the way people think nowadays. If Comcast thinks they're going to keep customers outside of the people they pay to have the damn service, they're freaking retarded. Every single one of them. And yes, I do lump my cousin and uncle into that group, because they work for Comcast and are justifying the crappiness that is the extra charge.

*sigh*

I'm so pissed off right now. I like my tv. I sleep with my tv on. I watch tv every single day. And now I won't have it because we're not making enough money to pay an extra $10 a box. So guess what? I'm screwed out of a tv now.

Thank you, Comcast asses.

Happy Easter!

It's late, but a very Happy Easter to all! ^_^

I had fun yesterday, despite the fact that I was with family I don't...particularly enjoy being around. Although for some reason, my aunt seems to have some sort of aversion to baking a ham for Easter. We had...ham sandwiches, which isn't really...Easter dinner, in my opinion. My boyfriend came over too, though he came a bit later because he got home late from paintballing with his friends. I was in my church choir, and he chose paintballing over me. lol, I'm just kidding!! Anyway, he came later than the rest of us. I told them he'd be there, but my aunt had us all start eating anyway...without him. Kinda rude, in my opinion (apparently I have alot of opinions today...), but oh well.

Then we played video games till it was time to leave. Fun, fun.

Then we came home and watched the Informant. I kinda...fell asleep during the movie, but that's only because I'd gotten a crappy night's sleep the day before and had to wake up early yesterday morning for church. I slept REALLY well last night, though.

Oh yes, and we found out Kohl likes eggs.

So...that was my boring Easter. I had fun, even though I kept getting a little annoyed here and there. *shrug* It was nice for the most part.

Shopping Adventures

So today we had to go shopping to pick up some things for us to wear on Easter Sunday tomorrow. I needed a slip to go under my white sundress (which I'm wearing onstage under some hot spotlights so Momma insisted that I get a slip so the audience didn't get to see my skivvies), and Mickey needed a new sundress altogether. So we stopped off at Ross to look at slips.

Apparently, they only come in brown.

Seriously, every single slip we looked at in Ross was brown, tan, or black. None of which go well under a WHITE sundress. So we decided to go around and look in Target. On our way out of Ross, we discovered that they literally block off the exits so that you can't get out of there without buying something. It's ridiculous. Only two registers were open, the rest lead to the exit but were blocked off with huge carts so no on could pass. So we decided to go around. And of course a line of carts is blocking the way to the exit. My parents led the way out through the entrance door, which the greeter at the front was none too happy with.

Target was a madhouse, but we managed to get a slip for my dress.

Then we decided to go to JC Penny's to pick up a sundress for Mickey and possibly find something for Momma to wear. Everything was going well until Momma took an outfit into the fitting rooms to try on. A line for the stalls was going out toward the isles it was so crowded. Luckily Momma got there before that happened. As I'm sitting there with Poppa and Mickey (Tinkerbelle was at work), I look up and watch as this boy, no older than fifteen, walks past this line of women and into the women's dressing room. He made eye contact with me and I gave him a "What the hell are you doing?" face. Shortly after, he was led out of the rooms by a woman with a walkie talkie and was telling the woman that he needed her to page his mother. She did so.

So Poppa promptly leans over to me and whispers, "It must be a bitch to be fifteen and be that lost from your mother." He didn't say it loudly, but apparently the boy heard him because he turned to look at us. Oddly enough, his "mother" was paged and he completely disappeared. I've never seen a wangster run so fast.

Shortly after, Momma came out of the dressing room (without the outfit. Apparently it didn't look good on her), and asked us who the boy was. Apparently, he had looked over the stall door at her before being escorted away by what she assumed to be security. Luckily she was dressed by the time he saw her, and she gave him her "angry mommy face."

What the kid was doing peeking over stalls? Well Momma and Poppa seem to think he was trying to get some cheap thrills over seeing women in their undies. But um...old women? Really none of the women in those stalls were under forty years of age. Apparently he had some kind of fetish, I guess I don't know.

Then we got back home and promptly went out to our fifth wheel to empty it. We may lose it to the repo guys and we wanted things like dishes and towels from inside before that happened. I lifted something wrong and now have a shooting pain in my left arm. Lovely.

So yes, those were my adventures today. Fun, no?

GRRRRRR!

The day is only half over and already it sucks balls. Between the major drama going on in the forum I'm in and all kinds of stupid crap going on in real life, I am in the pissiest mood ever.

I woke up late, thanks to the crappy thing known locally as Daylight Savings Time. Then I get out of bed to the oh, so welcoming face of Tinkerbelle, who for whatever reason is pissed off because Poppa went to work yesterday. I then get upstairs where everyone is just in the loveliest of moods. Tinkerbelle of course absolutely NEEDED to shower first, so she jumped in.....FOR 40 MINUTES. She got out at 11:30, Momma and I got into our different showers at noon. Half a freaking hour later, and I STILL wind up washing my hair in cold water. Because it's absolutely imperative that Tink get the damn shower first and then take the longest to wash her freaking body. God.

Then I get online to check emails, and PMs from the forums I'm in. And of course, proboards decides to be a douche and not load. Like ANY page at all. There's no warning, no thingy on the front page that says "performing maintenance," no. Just, "Oh, look! We're not going to let you access the boards because the site is run by idiots who can't give out some sort of warning that the sites are shutting down temporarily." Unless it's just my computer, in which case I am just that much closer to tossing this damn thing out a damn window.

*sigh*

And just now, Mickey came downstairs and knocked at my door in some kind of obnoxious little tune, which didn't even give me the chance to ask what she wanted without me having to open the door--topless, I may add, since I just got out of the shower. She then laughed hysterically about as she ran back up the stairs.

And on top of all of that, I have lost all ability to type properly. So forgive me but....

GGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff!

I hate this time of the month. You know what time I'm talking about. It effing SUCKS. Just when I'm starting to feel better, not be so depressed and be happy for once, it hits me and my attitude changes again. From depression to irritability. Very rarely have I been feeling really happy lately. Usually depressed. Then to go from that to...just being pissed off all the time at nothing in particular...I HATE IT.

Doesn't help that my online drama seems to match the drama I'm getting at home. There's a girl online, the one who owns a forum I'm a part of, who reminds me so much of Tinkerbelle it's frightening. I go online to disappear from the real world, not wind up talking to a bitchy 19-year-old who treats me like crap cause she runs the forum! Then to deal with the others on the forum...ugh. Some RESPECT would be nice. I mean, I don't want a frickin parade when I come online but I would like to at least be treated nicely. Lately...I don't know, it just seems to be getting worse.

Though that could be because of the time of the month for me.

*sigh*

Well, now that I've successfully ranted, I don't feel any better. The nature of life, I guess. Oh, well.

Romance Woes

I don't even know where to begin with this...

First off, I do like my boyfriend alot. He's a nice guy with a good heart and good career. But there's the problem that I don't seem to be physically attracted to him. We've been dating for a year and haven't done anything besides hug and occasionally cuddle on the couch. No kisses or anything else. It's weird, but I don't WANT to kiss him. Not really.

Normally this wouldn't bother me, and I would tell him that I no longer wanted to be in a relationship. But the fact that he is my third boyfriend in my entire 21 years of life and I still haven't had a first kiss makes me wonder. Not about him, but about myself. The three boyfriends I've ever had have been nice guys with good hearts, and I haven't felt the desirable need to make out with them or even give them a peck on the cheek. Of course, my first boyfriend ever turned out to be gay and the second guy, it turns out, wasn't quite pure of heart. The guy I'm dating now though is decent and kind to the point of it being a fault sometimes.

I guess my point is....I'm worried about myself, as a person. I've already shown symptoms of depression and social disorders, though I've never been diagnosed officially. I spend all my time online recently and most of my friends are people I haven't even met face to face. I love romance...if it's on tv or movies or in one of my role plays, but it seems I have no real interest in it in real life, which worries me. I do want to someday meet someone and have kids, but how can I do that if I don't even want to kiss the guy I've been dating for over a year? It worries me....alot....I really hope nothing's wrong with me that keeps me from getting into a romantic relationship.

Sometimes I really hate the way I am.....